I have not updated my blog consistently in a .long.time.
For a while I felt rather dry, and like I needed to just read and learn and be refreshed, rather than trying to produce and be always “saying something”…and now I am just kept more than busy with my kids and summer schedule and online courses.
But, here we are! 5 weeks from due date…:) I thought I would drop in with a few updates. 😉
We’re enjoying some summery things and anticipating the arrival of our precious Ezra Neal. My friends’ post today about when her daughter was born made me all the more excited that our day with #3 is coming soon!
Final weeks are kind of hard for me it seems. The smoothest part of pregnancy seems to be 2nd trimester and first few weeks of the 3rd…before and after I tend to be sick and/or quite uncomfortable. Walking a lot has kept me feeling fairly comfortable until the last week or so, but Braxton-Hicks contractions, heartburn, poor sleep and some other discomforts leave me just feeling like “we are running out of room, here!!” Weekly doctor appointments are abrasive to my impatient side! I think that this is all part of God’s game plan for the pregnant mama – if I were not so ready to be done with pregnancy, I may not be as thrilled that the due date is approaching… I am very thankful that I am looking forward to that day, and that God is helping me to deal with anxiety regarding labor and delivery and post-partum issues.
On the emotional side, I find it a little bit hard to stay focused on life in the closing weeks of pregnancy. I want to finish this season well, but it is pretty easy to be grumpy and tired and overly introverted! I have a lot less energy, and a lot more desire to be alone, and to be at home. Some of this I think is good and healthy – part of the nesting and preparation instincts from God. But, I am also noticing how easy it is to be entirely self-focused right now. I have a strong desire for quiet, time to think/read/pray/journal, several “baby-readiness” projects that feel urgent to me (but are non exactly common-sensical) and in general doing everything I can think of to prepare for welcoming our little one. Sometimes thinking about just about anything else feels like such an imposition, but it is necessary and healthy – especially as I am needing to be very diligent to complete my schoolwork. I feel like God is helping me to find a balance in this, and I’m thankful for that.
Mostly I’d like to fast-forward a few months, till I have completed my course requirements, have my baby boy in my arms and have lost 50 pounds…;) Too much to ask? No, I really don’t want to miss anything between now and then and I know God is preparing me and has work for me to do in the next 5 weeks. I certainly feel stretched in every sense of the word…particularly my belly! 😉
In other family updates, Nels is busy and enjoying new projects at work. He just finished helping with VBS at our church, is reading lots about counseling, and recently enjoyed a night of frog-gigging. 🙂 Kaya just finished her swimming lessons at the YMCA and, even with a traumatic event that set her back a bit, she finished very well. She is so excited to be a big sister again, and wants me to let baby Ezra sleep in her bed to cuddle her…;) Hudson is talking in full sentences and loves playing with the neighbor kids (most of whom call him ‘Bubby’-lol!), though Kaya is still his best friend. He’s becoming helpful with simple jobs around the house, like holding the dust pan for mama to sweep, and is very pleased with himself for being a contributor. 😉 I am taking my last two classes I need to finish my bachelor’s degree in Biblical studies, and also enjoying our Daniel bible study (by Beth Moore) with some ladies at church on Sunday mornings. We’ve had a full and busy summer taking weekend trips to visit family that we otherwise don’t get to see very often, and I am enjoying taking my “big kids” on some fun outings that will be more difficult once little brother arrives!
I think, overall, I have enjoyed this 3rd pregnancy very much…aside from puking and other tough symptoms. I feel like it’s been easier for me to feel connected to the baby and actually envision him as a real person since we’ve been through it before. Certain aches and pains are less alarming because I have experienced them previously and recognize them as ‘normal’…It’s also a lot of fun to anticipate meeting him together with our other little ones, and both Nels and I enjoy considering what life with him will be like, what his personality or looks may be, etc. For the first time I don’t feel like my whole world is being thrown upside down (becoming mama, becoming mama to a boy, etc…), but rather like our world is being enriched by a new little human being a part of it.
I hope you are enjoying a wonderful summer and that God is growing you and blessing your life with more of His presence. ❤